Twinkling lights, fanciful food, and gathering together to be merry and bright… the festive season is a great chance to unwind and let your hair down. But for some, it can bring stress rather than relaxation.

Neurodivergence and sensory overload during the holiday season

What with the bright lights, blaring music and festive food being forced upon you, the festive season can be immensely overwhelming for people with sensory processing differences. Those who are hypersensitive (which is common among neurodivergent people) typically find themselves with more elevated stress levels and greater emotional reactions in response to sensory input.

Managing these emotions and stressors can be exhausting. People with sensory processing difficulties who are subjected to higher levels of stressors with little opportunity to regulate their nervous systems are more prone to neurodivergent burnout.

Before I was diagnosed (AuDHD), Christmas was one big lie-fest:

• “I need the toilet” = I’m overwhelmed.
• “I need some air” = I’m feeling fidgety.
• “I just need to make a call” = If I sit here for one more minute, I will explode.
• “Do you want to watch a film?” = I need to escape from the noise.

Removing the need to hide behind unnecessary toilet trips or imaginary phone calls has been extremely liberating in recent years. I no longer have to hide or make myself small. I just say I need a break.

The pressure to socialise during the festive season

It’s not that we don’t want to see you. The festive season is normally a great time to kick back and catch up with everyone. But this flurry of socialisation and activity drains our social batteries far quicker than our neurotypical peers. We have to pace ourselves and allow plenty of downtime in-between.

Tips to help neurodivergent friends, family and colleagues during the festive season

Remove the pressure

Why does everyone decide that they simply must see each other all at once in the busiest month of the year? The pressure to be jolly and soak up the season is a lot, and it’s worth asking whether a couple of weeks will make much of a difference.

If you know someone who is struggling to keep up with the social pressures of the season, why not suggest meeting up in January instead, when it will be more quiet, and less overwhelming?

Give them a break

If you see someone struggling during a social occasion, let them know it’s ok to step away and self-regulate. If you’re hosting a formal event, best neuroinclusion practice would be to let people know where they can safely do this (and no — it shouldn’t be the toilet).

Change up the event

Social events don’t have to follow the same pattern. Other options include:

• Walking side-by-side while chatting (no forced eye contact)
• Creative workshops like wreath making or chocolate making
• Visiting a soft-light trail

Adapt

You can make things more comfortable by:

• Looking out for sensory-friendly events or quiet hours
• Providing safe or familiar food options
• Sharing the schedule in advance
• Being flexible and allowing last-minute plan changes
• Normalising comfort items like earplugs, defenders and fidget tools

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