Dear Thom,
I went to see Deacon Blue on Sunday in Liverpool. I stayed over at my boyfriend's the 2 nights before, mislaid my charger due to implementing some random system that involved putting it in an unspecified location for reasons that are lost to time. So I didn't manage to charge my phone or power bank. We both slept in and so I tried to charge my phone in the car. It took me about an hour to find the tickets because former me had randomly decided to set up a new email address for gig tickets and current me was unaware of its existence.
We had both got the times wrong and thought we needed to be there for 2 so rushed to the venue from the hotel in sweltering heat. My phone died. No charger. I lost it at my boyfriend. Of course it wasn't his fault but all of the rage and shame that descends on me when I fck things up has to go somewhere. I'd managed to stay on top of my sht for a few weeks and was so angry with myself. This was supposed to be fun but nothing is fun because I can't manage the logistics involved in having fun. So now I had the guilt at being mean to my boyfriend (he's not even into Deacon Blue - he was only coming for me).
Anyway, that's just a short summary of the myriad of ways I messed up on that day. Eventually we made it back to the venue and settled down to wait for Deacon Blue.
I often find it hard to focus at gigs. I find myself wondering how they rig the lighting or listening to people's conversations or focussing on my shopping list in my head. But Thom had my attention from the moment he walked on stage and he kept it throughout. He is one of the best frontmen I have ever seen. Not only that but the music was great. We both listened to it in the car on the way home.
But on top of all that, as a fellow alien, Thom's words about his ADHD and the lyrics of some of the songs were just what I needed. For most people forgetting something or forgetting to charge a device is an irritation, an inconvenience. For me it is an indictment of my whole being. Thom made me feel a little less of an alien that day. And after 2 very difficult years of being broke, broken and burned out the song "get up and start again" is going to become my anthem.
Thom says he likes validation. As an ADHDer I get that. So I hope you pass this message to him.
Ruth
PS. I don't know Embrace music very well but I suspect the band was kicked off the tour out of a fear they would eclipse the main act.
